Evanston: optimism and confidence
Evanston: optimism and confidence
Optimism and confidence are desirable traits in anyone, but especially surgeons.
While I was in Northwestern Memorial’s cardiac unit, I was visited by several teams of doctors, one of which revolved around a surgeon who was obviously a star. A glossy man in his forties, he told me, “I LOVE implanting pacemakers, but I don’t want to put one in you if you don’t need one.” I told him, “I don’t want you to put one in me if I don’t need one.” Everyone smiled. As it happened I didn’t need a pacemaker, and I appreciated the man’s forbearance.
About a week ago when the vision in my right eye went from light perception to mostly darkness I began to suspect that the optimism of my retina surgeon is misplaced. Yet when I saw him on a follow-up visit yesterday, he peered in and said, “Beautiful. Beautiful. You are doing fine.”
What has happened is that the nitrogen bubble put in the eye to help press the retina in place has partially shifted and is blocking light. In time the bubble should be absorbed and, perhaps, all will be well. However I can’t fly with the bubble and don’t want to make nonrefundable reservations until it is gone, so Christmas in New Zealand isn’t likely to happen.
I must confess to being surprised and disappointed at the slowness of my recovery. Not the continued lack of vision--the word ‘months’ is common in discussions of retina detachment surgery--but that I am still not myself.
I’ve resumed my full work-outs, which was easier and less painful than I expected after almost a month’s enforced layoff; but I continue to be tired, seldom staying awake until 9 p.m. and often taking a nap during the day.
This was, after all, the most micro of incisions. It is not as though I were cut open for something big, such as heart surgery or a hip transplant. True, the area is nerve rich. And perhaps I underestimate the resources the body needs to repair those nerves and to compensate for wildly incongruous visual input, as well as discomfort occasionally spiking into pain.
A positive sign is that I am regaining the six pounds I lost after surgery.
I actually looked pretty good at 150. But my pants kept falling down.
Thursday, October 13, 2011